Lenalee's Getting Married
by Seiina13
Summary: You all know the story of the boy who cried "wolf!" right? Enough said. Poor Komui...
1. Of Marrige and Wolves

**Hi, everyone…It would seem that I have (finally) risen from the dead. So, celebrate….**

**For the record, I don't own D. Gray-Man. What a pitty…**

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Everyone knows the story of the boy who cried "wolf!" so I thought that maybe, just possibly, someday….

"Oh. My. God. It didn't work…I can't get him to wake up!"

"What do you mean!? It didn't work?" Reever stared aghast at the sleeping head of the science department. "that's ridiculous…" He muttered, then shouted suddenly, "LENALEE-CHAN IS GETTING MARRIED!"

Komui snoozed on.

Lenalee skipped into the room, grinning, then stopped short at the frantic looks of the men gathered around her brother's desk. "What's wrong?" She pushed through the crowed.

Reever approached her and touched her shoulder gently. "Lenalee-chan, he won't wake up."

"She shook her head. "Impossible." She reached across the desk and shook the sleeping man. "Nii-san! I'm getting married!"

Allen hurried in. "What's wrong? What's all the screaming about?"

Lenalee ran to him and hugged him fiercely, tears streaming down her cheeks. "Allen! I told him I'm getting married and he won't wake up! And—" she sobbed into his chest, "I'm finally telling the TRUTH!"

"How incredibly ironic. It's the boy who cried wolf. An excellent time, too as the wedding's in an hour." Kanda put in, annoyingly calm and straight-forward as ever.

Allen nodded. "I hate to do this to him, but we'll have to go on without him. Let's go."

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"Hey, Lenalee-chan?"

Lenalee looked up from her tray of coffee, "Yes, nii-san?"

"Where's Allen? I haven't seen him for a week."

"Oh. Allen. He, uh, left for a bit."

"Okay, but can you get him back? You, he and Lavi are going on a search together.

"Sure, I'll ring him. Can I see the paper?" He handed her the details of the mission. "Perfect." she complimented him, scanning the paper. Then her eyes fell on the names:

_Lavi Bookman_

_Allen Walker_

_Lenalee Lee_

"Oh. One thing. Sorry, nii-san, I really hate to do it to you this way. I love him though, so please don't kill him." She crossed out the "_Lee_" and wrote, in her neat script, one word:

_Walker_

Komui's eyes widened and reached forward in slow motion. Allen chose that moment to waltz in through the door. "Did you tell him?" Then he saw the Hellfire blazing in his brother-in-law's eyes. "Uh-oh."

Lenalee ran up and kissed him on the cheek. "I love you, Allen, now run for your life."

Without another word, he sprinted out of the room, at full exorcist –speed, just as Komui picked up a remote control and the biggest, newest, shiniest Komurin-the-whateverth appeared out of nowhere.

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**Dum dum dum…**

**what can I say, I was bored. And I had writer's block. I've finished writing down the story, but reviews are greatly needed for my typing skills.**

**Just back from the dead,**

**Seiina**


	2. Of Coffee and Murder

**Yo. Still here. Glad to see that I wasn't completely forgotten in leaving the country…*happiness***

**I (still) don't own d. gray-man. Working on it, though. Gimme a week or so, and I'll have it.**

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Komui woke with his hands tied behind him, gagged, and bound to his chair. The broken remains of his latest Komurin lay scattered and smouldering about the room.

His sobs for his newly deseased robot ceased as soon as Allen entered, shutting the door quietly behind himself. He winced as the mad scientist glared daggers at him. He pulled the gag away. "Sorry, we only gagged you because your constant hollering of curses riveled those of our favourite swordsman. It was lowering his self-esteem. He went all mopey and locked himself in his room to glare at that flower of hil…" He maused, ignoring Komui's glares. "Y'know, I have a theory (it could be bunnies) that he has some kind of Beauty and the Beast ting going on…" He sighted, "Fine. I just wanted you to know that, besides meeding me for the Order, and to move tha ark, Lenalee would simply be inconsolable if you killed me."

He let that sink in for a moment, then added, "It's still your choice, of course. You can stay here, tied up forever, or you an come to your senses."

"Fine." Komui spat. "Untie me."

"Thanks." Allen untied the older man and led him back to his office. "I'm glad you agreed to be reasonable, but please stay that way. Lenalee told me, last night, that, if you killed me, she would never speak to you again."  
The only words that registered in Komui's mind were "last night." His eyes narrowed. "What were you to doing, _last night!?_"

Allen shrugged, trying to look casual, but he blushed furiously.

"_**ALLEN WALDER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" **_Everyone in the Order winced.

"View my masterpiece, Walker! Komurin: THE KILLER, runs completely on coffee! Right now, the only person on its hit list is you, boy, now DIE!" He let out a super evil-maniac laugh, and stood by to let Allen and the Komurin fight to the death.

Then Lenalee burst through the door, panting, and clutching a small stick in her hand. Everything froze as she burst out, "Guys, I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-… I'm pregnant."

A tumbleweed rolled by.

Followed by another. And another.

In fact, a whole army of tumbleweeds passed through the Dark Religious Organization Headquarters before anybody could act.

Then Komui turned slowly to his coffee-powered robot. "Komurin, change settings from "Kill' to 'torture until he pleads for death to come.

The fight resumed.

Ah, what a happy family, what a blissfully content brother-in-law relationship this to be.

End

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**So, did anyone like it? Anyone? No? Darn. Oh well. **

**Please, Please, Please review! Reviews make me happy, so THANKYOU to…**

**Clam: Yeah, I used to spell her name like that too, but then Baa yelled at me.**

**Bonds of Hatred: My, what an angsty name you have! And thank you. I do try.**

**Nella-chan: Thanks, This one was in the brewing vats for a while, I only just recently got to writing it down. I was deprived of paper and computer for WEEKS after I got to France, but I'm good now. Still got writers block, though.**

**-Seiina**


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